He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
