fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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