i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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