I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Randomize
