So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
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