Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Randomize
