im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
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