Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
