Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
