I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
