Kiss
Puke
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
