Umm I'm too high to move.
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
