Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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