the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
This couple is walking their pig around campus
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
Randomize
