In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
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