She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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