I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Randomize
