Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
