I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
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