god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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