People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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