That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Randomize