I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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