and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
That accounts for only three of the penises
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
