But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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