im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Randomize
