I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Randomize
