ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Randomize
