Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
