He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Randomize