Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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