Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
