He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Randomize
