Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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