Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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