I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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