Well apparently he's into motor boating.
matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize
