so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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