True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
