Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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