yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Randomize
