My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
I am naked and annoyed.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
