Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
