great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
