Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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