My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
