Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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