I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
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