best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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