my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
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